ERUPTIONS 4/1/10

Not April Fools

As Erev Pesach approaches My memory drifts back to past holiday seasons In this remembrance I’ve skipped over some events that do not apply to the story Forgive the editing please
In 1975 my one & only legal wife , had enough and left me & our son to “find herself”!
When her health failed, Maryann requested custody of our son to qualify for welfare At the time she was living in Newark to be near her boyfriend Meaning our son would attend Madison Middle school In what my sociology professor would call a “transitional neighborhood Prior to this my son had attended parochial school From the first my son experienced anti Semitism
When Passover arrived, Russ was spending time with me during his mom’s reoccurring illness The middle school didn’t, as I recall have a cafeteria
And He brown bagged his lunch
I asked if he’s prefer hardboiled eggs or tuna during Passover so as not to have to bring matzot He replied “I’m proud of being a Jew I’ll bring matza”!
It wasn’t the first time he made me proud or the last
Cannabis, marijuana, weed, gage, shit, herb It goes by many names But it’s all the same And there is a mystique about it that has always eluded me I have tried it a couple of times with little effect or benefit Each time it was implied , but it makes sex great It didn’t!
But two friends have had “amusing” experiences with marijuana that might give you a chuckle
Years back, a close friend used marijuana recreationally on occasion When he remarked to his brother a Chasidic Jew that he was having locating an MJ supply The brother said he’d have some one contact him.
One Sunday morning a few days later his doorbell rang At the door were two Chasidic gentlemen Complete with beard, payas, Price Albert coat and beaver shtremel Each carried two suitcases
He invited them in and The ‘leader’ said Reb Yussell said you were his sister and were looking for marijuana
They opened all four suitcases which were packed chock full of “weed”
My friend explained he was looking for a half ounce or ounce
Why did you bring so much?
They explained “We didn’t know how much you wanted!”
Second anecdote
An acquaintance of my is a street magician And IMO a heavy user of “herb” A few years back he was asked to perform at the White House Along with other entertainers Before the performance The entertainers were asked to remain in a large room Where they were told dogs would be brought in to sniff out bombs and drugs
And he was holding two ounces on marijuana
When he arrived home he called me and relayed this tale My reply “YOU BROUGHT GRASS TO THE WHITE HOUSE!” Well he said I don’t have a connection in D.C. and I can’t go on straight” “YOU BROUGHT GRASS TO THE WHITE HOUSE!” I repeated
Well obviously he was not calling me from Leavenworth So what happened I asked
He replied “I LOOKED FOR A DOG WITH A COLD”